Who? What? Where? When? Why?

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The question at hand is Who AM I?

The question is not: What am I? Where am ? When am I? or
Why am I?

The enquiry is direct, vigilant, discerning and impersonal.  The enquiry cuts through mind stuff that
 distracts and distorts the nature of reality, and what is.  It snuffs the seduction of ideas, thoughts,
notions, and beliefs, before they have a chance to hypnotize the awareness of a
so-called thinker.

When you lose focus of the question, you remove yourself
 from here and now; you lose yourself in the notion that you are a somebody who
knows something, thinks something, does something, or can be something.  In asking what, where, when and why, you risk
losing yourself in a story of conceptual speculation; you risk getting caught
up in the web of your own neurosis and conditioning.

For the most part, conventional spirituality has lost itself
in speculation.  Spirituality has become
a victim of its own story.  In the “what”
of a question, we grasp for philosophies of mind.  We are seduced by stories of Chakras, Chants,
 and cause/effect.  Here, we are tranced
by possibility, what is – is abandoned for what might be, could be, will be.

We lose ourselves in self engendered perceptions full of distinction
and diversity, and then seek understanding in the delusion we our self have
created.  There is no real freedom in
understanding; the apparent freedom we so eagerly seek, lies beyond ideas and words,
beyond the notions we gather and collect.
Freedom can never be bundled by understanding or knowledge.  Freedom can only be found in the midst of
here/now; a place where thoughts, feelings, emotions, perceptions,
associations, memories, intentions and desires – dissolve in the here/now of
presence – Self.

As we explore and obsess over details – the latest, greatest,
theories of Being, we ignore and deny the simplicity of what already, always,
is.  We lose ourselves in the sweetness
of colourful narratives – stories of emotional, astral, and casual bodies, as
 if they somehow allow or help us to become present with what timelessly is.

In looking for “where”, we take ourselves on fantastical
journeys, seeking and searching for the mystery I AM – in location.  We go to workshops promising riches and rewards
– worlds beyond imagination; novel replacements to a personal story that appears
to have gone array under the weight of self engendered thinking, judgment and
misconception.  Here, we lose ourselves
in paths of passion and desire; here, we imagine the physics of space harbors the
peace and knowing we so desperately seek.

“Off to India I will go…”; “this is it!”; the next; the biggest;
the best…  Here, in the “where”, we have
– flavor of the month, flavor of the year, flavor of the decade.  “On retreat I go”, imagining I AM will
somehow, magically appear, with the spoken words; the trips and tricks of a
so-called, enlightened teacher.  In the
pages of a book or some grand awakening experience, there I will find what has
always been missing.

 “When”, is the domain
of the neurotic mind.  Seeking and searching
are primal here, based on the illusion of time, merit, and gain.  Here, we lose ourselves in teachings of
becoming; in the deadness of accumulation, memory and merit, and the
titillation of a better tomorrow based on the autonomous achievements of an
“I”, “me”, “mine”.

Here, in the miracle of the moment, I AM is abandoned for
the taste of more: more thinking, more being, more having and more doing.  Here, we lose ourselves in the delusion and
probability of experiences had or wished for.
Here, we miss the inherent freedom that can be seen and found in the
midst of all experience; the miracle of a non-experience, the miracle of the
no-state-state of awareness that is radically awake and wildly aware – here/now.

The illusion of healing lies here, in the “when”.  Here, we are caught up in the savage cycle of
fixing, improving, changing, and transforming.
Here, the priest and the profit thrive; denying inherent divinity, they
would have you believe there is something wrong with Being; Being appears to be
overshadowed by a story of becoming.
Here, the “when” thrives, and the concept of savior, saving, and saved is
born.

The question at hand is Who AM I?

The question is not: What am I? Where am ? When am I? or
Why am I?

“Why” is a call for justification; it creates nonsense stories
and explanations about Karma, Dharma, conditioning and genetics.  Here, the natural sense of [I] is abandoned, replaced
instead with the doctrine of “me”; the story of an individual identity that can
only, ever be the victim or vanquished in life.

In the “why” of a question, awareness is entrapped in the
foreground of life experience, in the story of what’s happening or not
happening.  Here, we enmesh ourselves in a
materialistic world, a model of spiritual materialism built on notions of
separation and distinction.  Here, in the
puss of a wound called “me” and “I am separate”, we are subjugated by “what if”,
“if only”, “only when”.  Here, we are
hypnotized by infinite, external forces (stories); here, we lose ourselves in compulsion,
anxiety, fear and struggle.  Here, the
pain and sorrow of past thwarts the innocent impulse of awareness that is
already, always, open and empty, quiet and still.

The question at hand is Who AM I?

The question is not: What am I? Where am ? When am I? or
Why am I?

Who is it that hears?

Who is it that smells?

Who is it that tastes?

Who is it that touches?

Who is it that sees?

Can the seer herself be seen?

In the direct experience of here/now don’t assume [you]
exist; instead recognize existence.
Recognize awareness in which existence appears to arise and subside.  Recognize awareness as wholeness expressing
itself as all existence.  Here/now, find
freedom in the midst of all experience – as it is; beyond the neurosis of “a
person”, and a story that so easily overwhelms.
Here/now, find freedom in the direct experience of what’s happening –
beyond the notion of freedom and bondage.

There is no “where” in I AM.

There is no “when”, “what”, or “why”, in I AM.

Here/now, in the radical simplicity of I AM, the “who” is
stripped naked.  Here/now, in the alert,
alive, awake field of awareness, what can be seen is the radical recognition of
what already, always, is.

Already Being – never becoming.

Here, now, already, always – Being.

Nowhere to go – nothing to do.

Absolutely is, was, and will be.

Simultaneously before, during, after – forever.

Without affirmation, without effort; without merit, understanding
or practice.

Seen and unseen; over and over, again and again – You Are.

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“S o m e t h i n g   I s   T h e r e . . .” * N E W  V I D E O !

S o m e t h i n g . . . ”   * N E W   B O O K !

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If you have enjoyed these posts and you would like to make a donation to support my work, your contribution would be gratefully appreciated…


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The Doctrine of One [Book]
ZEN Shredding ~ The Prequel [Book]
ZEN ~ Shredding [Book]
Soulananda [Book]
Soulananda [Web site]
Bliss Blog [Michael Sean Symonds]

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(c) Copyright – Michael Sean Symonds. All Rights Reserved Worldwide

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One Response

  1. Loving Me. That is not selfish or sacrileges or self-centered. u r wrestling good stuff here. keep on.

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